Another Birthmother Discussion

Ryan and I had a very tender discussion tonight that was prompted by our FHE activity. We were tying a quilt for Isabelle's birthmother who is expecting a baby in January (which prompted the previous birthmother discussion that I recorded in another post).
We see Isabelle's birthmother quite often and she is very much a beloved part of all of our lives. Tonight Ryan quesitioned again (he has asked this a couple of times over the years, but never has the answer prompted such feelings for him) when he will get to see his birthmother again.
Background info: when we got Ryan the policy at our agency was more closed. We didn't share identifying information and the plan was to write and send pictures the first year and then once a year after. At the time that felt very comfortable for us but when we started meeting with Isabelle's birthmother and had such positive experiences I have had a greater desire to have at least some contact with Ryan's birthmother. In my annual letters I have said that we are willing to do more than the annual letter but we haven't heard from her since he was sealed to us when he was 6 mo. old.
So, this is what happened tonight:
I told him that he would see her again someday but I didn't know when. Then I told him that just because we don't see her doesn't mean she doesn't love him just as much as Isabelle's birthmother loves her.
I talked about how difficult her decision was and how much she loved him and that in order for her to be able to heal and be happy and to believe that he would do the same was to say goodbye.
He began to cry and told me that he missed her. (Although I have anticipated a discussion like this since we began our adoption journey years ago, it still caught me off guard.)
I snuggled him in my arms and told him that she was so brave and that she did exactly what Heavenly Father wanted her to do and that she loves him so much. Then Scott and I both told him again that he is such a treasure to us and that we are so very blessed to be his parents.
We talked about the Holy Ghost and how he learned at his baptism that one of the things the Holy Ghost does is comfort us. He agreed to pray for the Holy Ghost to help him feel better then he went up to his room for a break. After a few minutes Scott went up to be with him where more tears were shed. Ryan has always had a very tender heart which I am very thankful for. He came back ready to tie the quilt and was mostly back to himself for the rest of the evening.
Later as he was snuggling in bed he said he was sorry for crying - which of course made my heart break a little more. I told him that there was no reason for him to be sorry, that it was okay for him to be sad, but to remember that he is exactly where he is supposed to be with exactly who he is supposed to be with. I told him I loved him and he snuggled up and said, "I love you mom."

Why do I think moments like this (while very tender and private) are important to be shared? Because I feel very strongly that my family is a miracle and that maybe because I'm willing to share my treasured feelings about it there may be another family who is blessed with a similar miracle. I also believe in to my very core that my children are mine and that they have a very special, miraculous birth story that needs to be told.
And just in case you are wondering, there is no sorrow for me that he feels this way, because I feel the same way. I love her, I'm thankful for her, I miss her too. She is such an example of faith, love and courage and I want Ryan to love her and be thankful for her.
So, as I write through my own tears, I say again, "I thank Heavenly Father for birthmothers and I pray every day that he will bless and strengthen them for the immense sacrifice that they made that brings joy to so many."